The 'Right One'

What an intimidating decision that we have to make in our lives, when we are supposed to just know when to settle down like they do in the movies. But seriously-how the heck are we supposed to know 'he is the Right One?'

I've pondered this question, as did many of my friends, for many, many years.

I have to admit that there were (too) many times when I doubted that he was it. At the time I didn't know why, but now looking back, I think I have some insight that i'd like to share because I think it will help some of you out there facing the same issues.

However, do take my experience with a grain of salt because I've pretty much dated only one guy since moving away from home and being independent...

I think the main reason I doubted was because I was so unsure and curious of the 'what ifs' of this world. Like I mentioned in a previous post, I've always wondered what could happen and who I would meet at the next corner I turned. All of this happened during a period of major transition, from a kid to a college kid to a young adult to a working woman, I found it very hard to keep up with myself and my ever-changing needs and wants. In freshman year I wanted drama, sophomore year I wanted to make lots of love, junior year I wanted spontenaiety, senior year I wanted mystery... Really, doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out why I had doubts.

Through all of that mess in my life, he was always there. Though he underwent drastic changes as well, for some reason he just never left my side.

It wasn't until I stepped out of adolescence and into the 'real world' after graduation that I started to piece my life together.

I remember when I first started working 2 years ago, for the first time in my life I think I underwent depression. The stress of my job along with some other personal issues made me a very unhappy person that I lost my willingness to make friends, talk to people and find a reason to wake up every morning. It was probably the most vulnerable I have ever been and I just remember you saying to me, "I don't want to see you like this, I will work hard so one day you don't have to."

It was after this experience and period of my life that really shifted my values and his weight in my life. I spent 2 long years working on one very important thing: getting to know myself. I made it my new years resolution to be more selfish, and to really listen to my heart and know what I truly want versus what I think others want of me. This was truly an enlightening experience - highly recommended ;)

I changed a lot the past 2 years and I am so happy and proud of each and every change. I'm now living my own life the way nancy wants to live it in every single aspect. It wasnt until I did that that I could learn to accept and love someone else.

It definitely took awhile for me to fully adapt to the new life, but I now look forward to the Friday nights spent at home cuddling on the couch watching an action movie. I enjoy sleeping early and waking up afresh. I realized I prefer not wearing heels since I cant walk in them anyway. I now drink only leisurely with my friends and I don't mind the fact that his body cannot tolerate alcohol. I don't mind eating chipotle instead of Per Se. All of which I used to care so much about, seems to matter so little now.

Because of how strong our bond is, I don't even give a crap about conventional romance. I trust him with all my heart and that's all that matters to me.

I think that's how I knew that he was the Right One. And now we are getting married.

Lastly, I have to thank the Wrong Ones I've gone through because if it were not for them, I would've never known how precious he was. As much as I am angry and upset at the things that happened between the Wrong Ones and I, I am thankful because it expedited my trip to the Right One.

I reflect back on some of the Wrong Ones I've crossed paths with and I've realized... The Right One makes you warm and fuzzy from bliss and kindness, while the Wrong One makes you warm and fuzzy from alcohol.


-nn. happily enlightened.