Clocks

So recently one word has been recurring in my newly engaged life: clock.

This word has been referenced several times in several situations:

The first clock is others' clocks. My friend F said that the moment I informed her of my engagement, her clock started ticking. Unintentionally, I had set off a ticking clock in some minds that the next chapter of our communal lives has officially begun.

The second clock is my own clock. Questions like, "when are you getting married," "when are you having kids" start popping out in all directions and it's forcing me to start thinking about the next decade(s) of my life like a ticking clock. I've subconsciously placed 'deadlines' for myself. All of a sudden, I'm no longer thinking about my life like it's tomorrow or even next month, but rather next year, next 5 years and even forever.

I want to use this opportunity to remind myself and anyone out there to forget about clocks. It was really nice when we were young and we did everything together, but the beauty of growing up is that everyone lives their own lives at their own paces. That's the fun part of life so that we can all share different experiences and mentor each other in different ways! I may have moved onto the next stage in my life but there was just as much gratification before. For those who are still single, enjoy all the freedom and crazy fun you can possibly obtain now before you move on! Remember, you'll be married for the rest of your life so you might as well have as much fun as you can now! That part of my life was short-lived and although I do not regret it at all, I wouldn't mind elongating that phase a bit more.

For me, I got lucky and found Mr. Right early on and am no longer interested in looking around. I guess he feels that way about me as well so we have decided to become monogamous and settle down.

I had often dreamt of the magic of not knowing who is out there or who we may meet at the next corner of the block, but all that doesn't mean anything to me anymore.

I think I've found a true treasure and I feel like the luckiest girl in the world. He has been there for me even when I've pushed him away and has proven all the doubts I could ever form in my head wrong. Not to be corny, but I sincerely feel that because he is in my life, my life clock does not have an end to it. Everything I've wanted in my life, that I was not able to have due to the separation of my parents, will come true. Not just the usual stuff like having happy kids, a warm house and a loyal dog, but things like waking up every morning a happy girl. Because you love me for who I am, you enable me to be the best I can ever be.

Finally, the third clock is our clock together. It makes me smile that our clocks will soon converge and I absolutely cannot wait to start my life with you.

-nn. happily counting.